Monday, September 1, 2008

Barreling out of the closet

I was talking with one of my close friends a couple of weeks ago and I've realized that when I came out to everyone that mattered I didn't just come out of the closet-I came barreling out.  I started going to gay bars, found a "gay posse"  to join, began dressing a little differently (what feels right to me and not like I'm playing dress-up everyday), and while my life is very much the same as it was before I was out, it's very different too.  I didn't mean to change my life, make new friends, alter my dress, etc. but it all seems natural...and I'm a lot happier. I was so tired of lying and pretending and ignoring, that when I stopped I completely stopped and began living my life authentically and for me.  I missed that whole "finding myself" time in college and now that I'm in my mid-twenties I finally know who I am and what I want.  Don't get me wrong, it's created a lot of great changes in my life, but there is a part of my that wants to step back because it is a lot of change I was just curious if anyone else found that this happened to them as well.  Let me know if you've gone through this in your own life, felt backlash from friends who don't care that you're gay but are afraid of loosing you, etc.

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