Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Important survey!

I have a question for all bloggers. I'm currently having a bit of a moral dilemma and I could use your help. Girlfriend does not know that I have a blog. It's kind of my personal little thing and I like it that way. It's my place to vent, share, express myself, etc. without the eyes of those in my life. We had a long talk about not keeping secrets this weekend because my altruistic intentions of keeping health problems from her REALLY hurt her feelings. I shared, she understood, all is well with us, but it got me thinking about my blog. It's not hurting her, or our relationship, by hiding it from her. Should I feel obligated to tell her about it? Is it fine to keep this just between me and those of you who read what I write each week? Am I trying to justify my actions? Absolutely. However I would really like your input, especially those of you who have a blog-do your significant others (or family members) know about/read your blog? If yes, how does this affect what you write (i.e. do you censor things or run it by them first)?

7 comments:

LilliGirl said...

I do think in the interest of honesty she could know where it is or just know that you do have one and want to keep it private. i censor myself becuase there are just some things I don't want the world to know. it has not so much to do with the audience though as it has to do with me. :)

incognitochristian said...

I started a livejournal back in high school. That was my private space to write my thoughts, and get advice from online friends. I didn't let any significant others know about it. If you feel that this is your space to vent a bit and not be judged and you would rather she didn't know (so you could continue being yourself) I see no problem with keeping it from her. We all need our own little personal/private things...

crystal said...

Ahh, moral dilemas! In my opinion, it is ok to either keep it from her or tell her and ask (trust) her not to read it. The reason that I say this is because I feel like blogging can be comprable to journaling or keeping a diary. It seems acceptable to keep the contents of a diary from a significant other, so why not a blog?
On the flip side though, if it is making you feel guilty or uncomfortable because you are hiding something from her, that could impede on your relationship in negative ways...in which case it would be better to tell her.
I had a friend with this problem, she solved it by telling her partner about the blog and then opening a new one specifically for the venting aspect and trusted her partner to not read that one. Just a thought...
(sorry about the rambling, thats what you get for asking a aspiring therapist!!!)

Nulaanne said...

My Honey knows about my blog, but then I can't keep anything from her. I don't want to, I don't know if this helps you or not.

Taylor said...

Jessi knows about my blog and she has read it. I understand that you want a place where you can rant without her seeing. I would tell her that it exists but that it's kind of like your personal journal and would prefer that she didn't read it. Most of it you tell her anyway except maybe some earlier entries. Right?

Jody said...

It's always okay to keep private things private, but this isn't exactly private, you share it with the world, why not her? Maybe she has one too.......how would you feel about that?
Of course if you do tell her about it you don't have to make a big deal about it. I'm with LilliGirl, tell her and let her know you want to keep it private. You know your girl better than anyone else, what's the worst thing that happens?

Vikki said...

My partner knows I blog and she reads my blog...and has been known to log in and fix typos. ha ha. I censor myself not because of the audience but because of my own boundaries. I have a rule that I wouldn't blog something that I wouldn't say to the person's face. It works for me. When anything comes up that involves my partner, I ask her if I can post it. We negotiate. Also, I am horrible at keeping secrets so I don't think I could do it.