Monday, January 3, 2011

Ray of Hope

Thank you all so much for your thoughts, support and condolences. These past few days have been very difficult for me (and Girlfriend) as we struggled to figure out what to do now. After much tears and feelings and processing (we are lesbians after all) it was time to get proactive again. I was not going to be content to be told I could not have any legal standing and e-mailed half a dozen lawyers here and in other states. Unfortunately no other state (including DC) can grant us an adoption and one lawyer here in NC told me there was nothing I can do. PSHHH. What where they new and thought I would accept that??? No.
I continued searching the interwebs and found out about a little used thing called co-guardianship. I could find out TONS of information about co-guardianship for other states but NOTHING for North Carolina. It was as if they didn't want you to know about it. I called another law firm (one that has done many same sex second parent adoptions) and the woman told me, "Yes, of course! She can appoint you as a co-guardian. It only takes a week to go into effect and will at least give you some rights and legal control while this whole mess is being sorted out." So there, we now have a plan that does not include twiddling our thumbs while the state screws us over. It's not what I wanted, it's not ideal but it's sufficient for now. The lawyer also said that she has, "received a ton of e-mails and phone calls from families freaking out about what to do now" and that she is confident there will be more lawsuits and probably some changes down the road (again). At least for now we have a ray of hope that while I can't be their legal parent, I can be their legal guardian. I will continue to keep you all updated as things unfold...