Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Better Late Than Never

I know this is a little late, but internet access was limited at Christmas and then all that *future* baby mama drama happened, but here it I spent Christmas-a.k.a My family is not right.
On Christmas Eve my mom decided we should have eggnog, but she couldn't find any suitable glasses. My grandma handed her shot glasses and thus the new tradition began. The Charlie Brown tree belongs to my aunt. Really. It was a gift from my mom and can barely stand up without extra supports. So my mom and I took shots and my aunt drank too much wine and passed out. What were we to do then? Search her online dating profile and wink at people of course! Christmas night got even stranger when my grandma joined us in shots for a game of Left, Right, Center-or as my mom renamed it Left, Right, Drink up bitches. About 3 games in my grandma was trying to tell a story when she stopped mid sentence and said, "Oh hell I'm sh*tfaced." I texted all of this to Girlfriend who replied with, "I'm glad I'm marrying into that. My family is just sitting here staring at one another with nothing to say. We could use some alcohol but that would send us to hell."

Sorry it's late but it was too fun not to share with you!


Anonymous said...

I bet Girlfriend was sad she wasn't there.
Too funny!

Erin said...

You have one of the most hilariously awesome families ever.

The Surprise Dyke said...

Notjustafemme-She was VERY sad and wants to do Christmas "our way" next year :-)

The Surprise Dyke said...

Erin-Thanks, I think they're pretty awesome :-)

Just another lesbian said...

Your family sounds somewhat similar to mine! I spent my Christmas doing Jager bombs with my dad, stepbrother, stepbrother's baby's mama, stepbrother's baby mama's friend, and some other people. Then, I ended up on the front porch smoking a little of the green (first time... haha) with my dad, my aunt, and her brother. On second thought... maybe my family is worse.