Friday, July 24, 2009


*Disclaimer-this post is very depressing. If you want to skip to the bottom where I make up for it with two happy/fun stories I will not be offended.*

It's been a couple of emotional weeks over here which caused me to run away from blogging for a little while in order to take care of some things. 1) Girlfriend's childhood dog (we shall call her Feisty Ankle Biter) has had a large mass in her abdomen for about 7 months. They had drained it several times, but Feisty Ankle Biter was turning 15 years old, and clearly suffering. Girlfriend's mom made the decision to put her down on Wednesday. I went with them and seriously, it was one of the saddest things I've seen. Everyone was waiting on the vet to get there (who normally doesn't work on that day) and Feisty Ankle Biter was not doing well. It should come as no shock to you that I am a rock. A rock people. A. rock. I was not a rock. The vet got there about 5 minutes after Feisty Ankle Biter passed, and all four of us sat there and cried. Everyone is doing better, but it was a rough time. 2) My grandpa who I love (and am SHOCKINGLY just like) had to have a double hip replacement. The doctors were waiting on doing the surgery because he had an infection that wouldn't clear up, leading them to believe that it might be bone cancer. He is currently undergoing treatment for stomach cancer and about 10 years ago battled colon cancer...twice. Thankfully the tests came back that it wasn't bone cancer, but in the process of replacing both his hips they broke his leg. Yes, you read correctly. They broke the man's leg. Which SOMEHOW they didn't notice until after they were looking at x-rays of his completed surgery, thus sending him back to the OR to fix their f*ck up. When I was taking with him on the phone he said, "Those G*d damned doctors broke my G*d damn leg and are making ME pay for it. What kind of bullsh*t is this!?!?" I love my grandpa, he makes me laugh. 3) Grandpa was doing better and had moved to a rehabilitation center when his blood pressure went through the roof and wouldn't come down. The doctors finally got it down a little but everyone is shocked that he didn't stroke out. I'm not. The man is made of chemicals and is essentially radioactive after so many treatments after all these years, compounded by the fact that he drove an 18 wheeler delivering hazardous chemicals to different companies for all of his working days. He's going to outlive us all and bitch the entire time. I love it :-) SOOO, hopefully this helps explain where I've been and why I haven't posted in a little while.

Ugh, it's too depressing to end a post this for two happy/fun things!

1) Girlfriend and I were driving and talking about who knows what when the conversation made its way to her talking about how she's "knocking at thirty's door" is a paraphrase of what followed:
Me: You have two years.
Girlfriend: 1 year, 8 months.
Me: Whatever. Are you really freaked out about turning thirty or are you just messing around? (if she was seriously freaked I wasn't going to pick at it)
Girlfriend: Nah, it doesn't bother me but you should know something.
Me: Ok.
Girlfriend: My biological clock is ticking. Seriously.
Me: How fast is it ticking? Did this just start?
Girlfriend: No, it's been ticking but it's gotten loud and now I can hear it.
Me: [insert awkward silence here] Um, baby....I love you but there is nothing that I can do. You're the scientist. I'm just saying...
She makes me laugh. I'm not sure what she wants me to do about her biological clock ticking. I think she just likes making awkward and mildly uncomfortable situations when I have nowhere to go (a.k.a. in a car) and hide.

2) We are heading to Charlotte Pride tomorrow with some of our friends which should lend itself to some fun stories and maybe (gasp!) pictures. Down side: it's supposed to be in the 90s. I'm from Jersey...I don't do 90s...I do air conditioning. If you are at Charlotte Pride tomorrow and see a puddle of cargo shorts sluggishly moving, it's me-come by and say hi!


Carolyn said...

1) I like how feisty ankle biter's nickname came out to F.A.B. cos I'm sure she was a fabulous dog. Glad you are all doing better, it's always hard losing someone you love.

2) Your grandpa is amazing. And really, I don't think it's ethically correct for your grandpa to need to pay the doctors to fix they leg THEY broke. They have malpractice insurance for a reason, they should be paying for it.

3) I am very amused by the way she corners you in those situations.

4) I am jealous of you two going to pride, but not jealous of the heat. Yuck.

The Surprise Dyke said...

Carolyn-1) I did not realize that it spelled FAB...which makes it even better because she was a fabulous dog. 2) I agree, but at least they have to deal with him bitching, moaning and groaning about it 3) Me too! It's even better when she doesn't do it on purpose 4) Don't wasn't worth it :-(

LilliGirl said...

poor puppy. poor mommy.

Grandpa Rocks!

The Surprise Dyke said...

LilliGirl-I agree :-)