Friday, February 13, 2009

Pavlovian Response

I might have already posted about this, but oh well-welcome to my world of repetition, which is actually very fitting if I have posted about this already.  I'm too lazy to look back through all of my old posts so you all can just experience it with me today!  
Let me preface that I love this student.  He is one of the sweetest little boys you will ever meet, has a heart of gold, and tries so hard to get it...but never does.  Language is a major issue and I work with him one on one every day showing him the short vowels and practicing basic math facts.  I care deeply about him, enjoy having him in class, and don't mind taking extra time and effort to help him succeed.  
Now that that is done I can get to the story without feeling like a total ass.  My students have recess 3 days a week (PE the other two days) and with this one child it is the same routine EVERY FUCKING WEEK.  I swear it's a Pavlovian response.  We go outside, we MUST ask our teacher the same DAMN questions every time in the SAME order, being surprised at the SAME answer...that is until this week.

Every recess day the conversation went like this:

A-Miss ____, you have husband?
Me-No.  No husband.
A-Why you no married?
Me- Because I'm not.  Why does it matter?
A-You no want to be married?
Me-Why do I have to be married?
A-You grown.  Need to have husband.  Have babies.  You have kids Miss ______?
Me-I have over 20 kids, I love them very much.
A-20!  Wait, that's us!  We no count.  Why you no married or have kids?
Me-One day I will get married and have kids, okay?  You go play.

Today however, I had some fun at his limited English expense.  I was tired of giving the same answers since AUGUST and honestly just frustrated with state laws and seeing them hurt the people around me.  The conversation went a little different than usual...

A-Miss ____, you have husband?
Me-No.  No husband.
A-Why you no married?
Me- Because the state legislature believes they have the right to determine who I am allowed to have a relationship deemed worthy of protection-even though I pay my taxes and am a law abiding citizen-solely based on gender.
A-Um. I go play.
Me-Ok, have fun.

Oh, and Happy Valentimes Day...with an m because it only comes one time a year.  A student emphatically told me that today and I thought I should pass it on for your reading pleasure :-)


Dar said...

LOL!!!!! :) Good for you; at least your answer was in sync with what you were thinking and feeling inside.

I did read about this little fellow before so this conclusion is all that much better for having done that. ... I wonder if he'll ask you again? (Grin)

raych said...

I do the same thing when asked a series of questions the I really don't feel like answering - respond with an answer filled with words they may or may not understand and a sentence structure too complex for their little heads to comprehend, resulting in them leaving you alone and thinking twice before asking you the same shit next time.

Surprisingly, this works well with adults, too

Sabrae Carter said...

LOL!!! just loved it!!! Bet he will definatly think twice about asking you that again!!!

Carolyn said...

I laughed out loud in my hotel room when I read that. My cousins jumped on me to see what I was reading. You are awesome.

The Surprise Dyke said...

Dar-I'd bet a dollar that he will totally ask again

The Surprise Dyke said...

Raych-so true, only adults tend to fester once they have walked away :-)

The Surprise Dyke said...

Sabrae-I'd bet a dollar that he will totally ask again

The Surprise Dyke said...

Carolyn-I hope your cousin enjoyed as much as you do!

beans said...

HA--that's funny! Aren't kids great! I do the same thing where I give them crazy answers--at least enough to make them think and go away for a minute.